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In July, we printed a sequence of tales about San Francisco’s try to deal with the rising variety of homeless and addicted folks dwelling on the streets. We adopted Evan, who had been homeless for years, as he sought to flee the habit that was threatening his life. 4 months later, we test in on how he’s doing.
No Simple Repair is a three-part sequence from Radio Atlantic about homelessness and habit in San Francisco.
The next is a transcript of the episode:
Hanna Rosin: I’m Hanna Rosin. That is Radio Atlantic. Final 12 months, we printed a sequence referred to as No Simple Repair. If you happen to haven’t heard it, it’s best to return and hear. It’s about San Francisco’s makes an attempt to deal with pockets of homelessness and habit. It’s additionally an in depth and unusually humane portrait of 1 man—his identify is Evan—dwelling on the streets and barely managing his fentanyl habit.
In the present day, we’ve an replace on that sequence.
[Music]
Rosin: When reporter Ethan Brooks met Evan, he was in unhealthy form.
Evan: It’s raining, and I’m chilly, and I’m hungry. (Laughs.) I’m over it. I’m so over it.
Rosin: Years of habit had left him with a leg that was so swollen and contaminated that he was liable to shedding it. On high of that, he couldn’t preserve meals down. And he didn’t know why. His finest pal, Joe, was nervous.
Joe Wynne: I imply, I count on Evan to die on the market. I’ve seen no items of proof that persevered past 72 hours of him heading in another path, and I’ve seen 10,000 items of proof of him headed in direction of demise.
Rosin: Evan ended up within the hospital. And he agreed to enter an habit therapy program in San Francisco—one which seemed so much just like the rehabs the place he had tried and didn’t get clear earlier than.
Evan: I may really feel, like—in my head, I’m like, I’m gonna achieve success this time. However like, I’m nonetheless a bit of nervous about having doubt—like, What if I don’t, although?
Rosin: Ethan Brooks goes to take it from right here.
______
Ethan Brooks: The final time I noticed Evan, he was in a room in San Francisco Common Hospital.
Brooks: Need to relaxation for a bit of bit?
Evan: Yeah, perhaps a bit of bit.
Brooks: We spoke for just a few hours, and that is how our dialog ended.
Brooks: I imply, I’ll be capable to name you on the cellphone and stuff, however I simply gained’t be capable to get you in individual for some time.
Evan: Yeah, I’ll undoubtedly put you on the listing of individuals I can speak to in therapy.
Brooks: Evan had been accepted to long-term residential rehab in San Francisco. He wished to lastly get clear, and provides area and time for his leg to heal. And he wished to reconnect along with his son, who he hadn’t seen in years.
Joe—that’s Evan’s pal—purchased him a cellphone, began a bunch chat, plugged within the cellphone subsequent to Evan’s mattress, and flew dwelling, again to his household in Washington State. So Evan was as soon as once more on his personal.
[Music]
A month handed, and I didn’t hear from him. After which, he texted: He had 30 days clear.
To have a good time, Joe despatched movies from Cameo; that’s the app the place minor celebrities ship customized messages. In a single, a bunch of burly dancers delivers Joe’s message:
Dancers: Evan is nice. Fentanyl is unhealthy.
Brooks: Evan is nice. Fentanyl is unhealthy.
Brooks: 30 days sober.
Brooks: Congrats, bro.
Island Boy: Yo, Evan, I heard you’re 30 days sober off fentanyl.
Brooks: One other was from one of many twin TikTok stars within the Island Boys. I can’t inform which one.
Island Boy: So carry on going. It goes day-to-day, my boy. Preserve doing all of your factor as a result of that fetty ain’t no joke, my boy.
Brooks: About two months later, there was a notification within the group chat, slightly below the movies. It mentioned, “Evan has left the dialog.”
(Telephone rings.)
Brooks: Once I referred to as his cell, there was nothing.
(Voicemail greeting performs: “I’m sorry, the individual you are attempting to succeed in has a voicemail field that has not been arrange but. Please attempt your name once more later. Goodbye.”)
Brooks: It was the identical on the rehab facility.
Operator: So I don’t know—I can’t verify or deny that the individual is right here. However I may take a message in the event you’d like to go away one.
Brooks: Okay. Okay, gotcha.
Brooks: After which, on November 17, seven months since I had final spoken to him, I bought an e-mail.
The account photograph was of a person in a pressed lavender button-down shirt tucked into denims, with one hand on his hip, posing in entrance of a discipline. It was Evan. We arrange a video name.
Evan: I haven’t had an Apple product in a very long time, and this MacBook is fairly irritating.
Brooks: To determine easy methods to use?
Evan: Yeah, simply all I wished to do is scroll down, and I haven’t fairly figured that out but. So I click on on one thing, after which use the arrow keys ’trigger I can’t discover the fucking scroll within the nook.
Brooks: Seems this isn’t straightforward in the event you’ve missed the final 5 years of technological advance.
Brooks: Two fingers is a scroll.
Evan: Oh, I can’t wait to attempt that.
Brooks: Simply getting Evan on a name didn’t assure a lot.
Rehab is certainly higher than dwelling on the road, but it surely’s not essentially a spot the place you get clear. In 2023 and 2024, San Francisco’s largest publicly funded rehab supplier noticed a string of overdose deaths inside their amenities. Evan says he’s been in others, the place sufferers and workers have been nonetheless utilizing.
I had recognized the place Evan was, however till this dialog, I didn’t know how he was, or what had occurred within the seven months since we final spoke—if he had modified.
[Music]
Again in April, when Evan was speaking about getting clear, this was not the primary time the scene had performed out—not Joe’s first time flying down to seek out him, not the primary time he was hospitalized. There was a form of script for what would occur subsequent.
Evan: I’d make this entire plan about going to therapy, and as quickly as I’d be alone and be out exterior of the hospital, I’d simply get out.
Brooks: Evan would get his few days dwelling inside; Joe would go dwelling to his household. Then the hospital would prepare for Evan to journey to rehab by way of a taxi or a bus—
Evan: After which as quickly as I hit the Tenderloin, I’d simply be gone immediately.
Brooks: In these 10 unsupervised minutes, Evan would disappear. He would get out of the taxi, return to shoplifting, again to promoting what he stole, again to fentanyl.
That was Evan’s selection. It’s true that Evan is accountable for his personal actions in these 10 minutes. It’s additionally true that nearly nobody beats a fentanyl habit like his by way of willpower alone.
This time round, Evan’s first cue, the half within the script the place he would usually simply disappear, got here when the hospital wished to discharge him. Hospital stays are costly; they wished to ship him to a shelter for the weekend earlier than rehab admission opened up on Monday.
However the hospital’s habit workforce knew if he went to a shelter, he would relapse. They satisfied the medical doctors to maintain him for the weekend, regardless of the expense.
The primary alternative to vanish got here and went.
Then it was time to take a taxi from the hospital to rehab, which is known as Harbor Gentle.
Evan: One of many addiction-team nurses after his shift stayed within the cab with me after which rode there to Harbor Gentle after which stayed there with me for an hour to ensure that I used to be, like, cool and didn’t have any second ideas after which left.
Brooks: So one other alternative to exit had come and gone as a result of somebody took the time to stick with him.
Brooks: Do you keep in mind your first day, or first days, at Harbor Gentle?
Evan: Yeah, I keep in mind. I used to be simply sleeping a lot. I’d stand up and simply eat and pee. They might simply convey me my meals. So it was kinda like I used to be within the hospital once more.
The duty of showering once more, I used to be like, Ugh. And simply the duty of getting to unwrap my leg, get within the bathe, do the entire—I used to be identical to, I don’t even care. I’ll simply be smelly. And it was simply my mind deciding what was necessary and what wasn’t. For therefore lengthy, that wasn’t necessary.
Brooks: Earlier than Evan arrived at Harbor Gentle, there have been two issues, after 5 years dwelling on the road, that had pushed him towards restoration.
The primary was his leg, which had this enormous open wound.
The opposite factor that introduced him right here was that he couldn’t preserve meals down. At first, the physician thought he might need celiac illness—gluten intolerance. After which they came upon that his iron was dangerously low; he was anemic.
Evan: At first, they thought me being anemic was a weight loss program factor ’reason for simply consuming nothing however sweet and ice cream on the road for therefore lengthy. Even on the time, if any individual have been to inform me, Oh, in the event you preserve doing fetty like that, you’re gonna find yourself turning into anemic, I’d’ve been like, So? Clearly, my leg was falling off, so it wasn’t—
Brooks: Yeah, it’s like, Who cares about being anemic when your leg is falling off?
Evan: Proper, proper.
Brooks: Once I first met Evan, he was dwelling a life that, on the great days, felt like a kind of freedom: He may fend for himself. He wasn’t accountable to anybody.
However even only a few days into therapy, he may already see it extra clearly: It wasn’t freedom; it was dependence, in nearly each sense of the phrase.
Evan was dwelling like a toddler, actually consuming nothing however sweet and ice cream.
Evan: I keep in mind being nervous as a result of I used to be glad to sort of get my life going once more, however on the similar time, I had been having fun with not being a accountable grownup for such a very long time.
I used to be sort of nervous to be like, Nice, no longer solely do I gotta discover ways to be an grownup once more. I gotta work out how I’m gonna take care of all of the disgrace and guilt of not being one for therefore lengthy.
Brooks: Harbor Gentle, Evan’s rehab, is run by the Salvation Military. Aside from being often known as a strict, and moderately intensive, therapy program, the fundamentals will likely be acquainted: conferences, meditation, acknowledging the next energy, celebrating milestones.
Evan: I really feel like all people’s congratulating me for studying easy methods to, like, pee standing. Like, Pee-pee standing up. Like, Good job, Evan. Like, You use the toilet by yourself. No extra diapers.
That’s how I’d at all times be, like, Congratulations for catching up with the remainder of us, like, for the final 15—you already know? And so I’d really feel sort of dumb about it. Even two months in, speaking about it with among the counselors there, they have been like, How a lot time do you will have? And I used to be like, Oh, I’ve two months, and folks have been clapping or no matter. And I’m identical to, Yeah, it’s no matter. It’s two months.
[Music]
Brooks: In actual phrases, two months was undoubtedly not “no matter” for Evan. It’s the longest he had been clear in a really very long time. However the outdated temptations have been nonetheless there.
To start out, Evan was nonetheless in San Francisco. Nearly daily, he noticed folks he knew from his life earlier than. And past that, even after two months clear, his leg simply wasn’t therapeutic the best way he hoped it will.
Evan: My leg improved, after which it simply stopped, and it was a very sluggish development. I didn’t know if I used to be doing one thing fallacious or if it was going to worsen once more.
Brooks: It began to really feel like, If his leg wasn’t going to get higher, if he stood an opportunity of shedding it, what was the purpose?
Evan: I used to be like, All proper, simply—we’ll do the six months, present all people that I can, I’ve tried, after which I’ll return out.
Brooks: After the break, six months.
[Break]
Brooks: In his years dwelling on the road, Evan managed to take care of himself. However there have been different folks, necessary folks, who he ignored.
Evan has a son. They talked on the cellphone generally, by way of Evan’s mother or sister. However as his child bought older, he didn’t wish to speak to Evan, and Evan didn’t wish to speak to anybody.
That modified at Harbor Gentle. If Evan wished any shot at reconnecting, he’d not solely need to study to be an grownup in only a few months, but additionally discover ways to be a father.
Evan: I had this in my head, like, a recreation plan for the way I used to be gonna deal with speaking to my household once more. However my counselor there was like, Nope, that’s not how we’re gonna do it, not undoubtedly gonna do it like that.
Brooks: What was the sport plan, and why was it rejected?
Evan: Like calling them, like, as soon as every week after which calling my son after which speaking to him. However my counselor determined that You’ll be able to’t use your cellphone in any respect for the primary 30 days; it’s a whole blackout. After which, after that, you solely get two 10-minute cellphone calls a day.
Actually, once I would name my mother, one, by the point she answered, it will most likely kill an entire minute, two. She would spend, like, 5 minutes crying. So now I’m left to have, like, 4 extra minutes. I’m like, Mother, you simply—what am I speculated to do? I—after which there’s my entire cellphone name for the day, after which, if I name any individual else, they usually don’t reply, and that’s it.
So he was like, You’re going to put in writing letters, and that method you possibly can converse extra, get it down, and actually, it’ll really feel extra heartfelt that you just’d spent the time to put in writing all of it, your emotions and all the pieces, out on paper and mail it.
Brooks: In order that’s what Evan did. This was the start of what would turn into a relentless mailing marketing campaign geared toward his son.
It hasn’t been straightforward to get a lot out of him. Evan hadn’t seen his son in eight years. Nobody would blame him for not wanting to speak.
However over the months, Evan started to study what he had missed. Everybody thinks his child seems to be like him. He’s an adventurous eater like Evan, has a candy tooth too, additionally like Evan. There was an image of him attempting a chocolate-covered cricket on a discipline journey to D.C. And he was a little bit of a performer.
Evan: For instance, for his fifth-grade commencement, he shocked all people and dressed up as a banana—
Brooks: Superior.
Evan: —and walked throughout the stage in an enormous banana go well with. He actually likes the clarinet. Really, he’s, like, first chair in his class after which third chair all-county or one thing. He’s actually into it.
Brooks: In October, six months into therapy, Evan’s household flew out to go to him: his mother, his sister, and his son. Evan’s pal Joe and Joe’s son, Barrett, got here down too.
The final time Evan noticed his son, he was 5 years outdated. Now he was 13, and was rising a mustache.
They went to the arcade, did an escape room. Evan mentioned they’ll nonetheless be in there if it wasn’t for the children. Barrett and Evan’s son have been quick mates.
Evan: The primary evening we went out someplace, they have been throwing one thing—it was like sweet or one thing—and one thing bounced off after which hit me. After which they, like, giggled and ran away. And my son was like, The place’d it go? After which Barrett was like, “It hit your dad.” And it simply—I’ve by no means—I hadn’t been a dad for such a very long time, so it was only a sort of surreal second. He didn’t even name me Dad; it was any individual else calling me Dad. But it surely was extra of only a reminder of like, “Oh, yeah, I’m.”
[Music]
Salvation Military officer: Do you will have any company that you just wanna welcome?
Evan: I do have just a few.
Brooks: The identical weekend his household visited, after six months of therapy, Evan graduated from Harbor Gentle. Within the video, he’s standing at a lectern, sporting a yellow plaid shirt. He says he’s attempting to not cry.
Evan: A smart girl as soon as advised me, “The one factor that you need to change is all the pieces.” I sit up for being the most effective son, brother, and father and pal I might be. Thanks.
Brooks: After commencement, Joe and Barrett and Evan’s mother and sister and son flew dwelling.
Brooks: You guys are nonetheless writing letters right here and there, or no?
Evan: Yeah, yeah, undoubtedly. I simply despatched one. I’ll take the—I despatched him letters. He doesn’t actually ship me something again. I don’t know if the choice was given to him, sort of, like, Your dad needs your cellphone quantity. Do you wish to give it to him, or do you wish to simply preserve writing letters, or what do you wanna do? And I may simply see him being on his cellphone, like, Yeah, no matter, letters.
And so I used to be like, Oh, nicely, if that’s what he needs to do, then I’m simply going to bombard him with letters, to the place he’s like, “Rattling it, I ought to have did cellphone name.” So he hasn’t caved but, however I undoubtedly ship him two or three a month.
Brooks: Evan is now in a sober-living home. He works in a kitchen just a few days every week, and on the opposite days, he takes courses to turn into an addiction-treatment peer counselor.
That query of if it was attainable for Evan to remain clear this lengthy, thus far, has been answered. His leg isn’t totally healed; even after eight months, the wound remains to be there. However he can stroll round high-quality and can have a surgical procedure quickly to assist along with his circulation.
So now the query for Evan isn’t a lot if he’ll stay, however how.
Just a few weeks in the past, Evan was using the bus dwelling from a gathering when he bumped into an outdated pal from when he was dwelling on the road.
Evan: And I talked to him the entire bus journey and once I bought off I helped him carry his stuff off and frolicked with him for a bit of bit, however once I had went to speak and hang around with him and invited him to take a seat subsequent to me, it was simply sort of like, Right here’s this actually soiled, gross-looking homeless dude, and I’m cleaned up sufficient to the place folks wouldn’t suspect that of me in any respect. After which I’m inviting him over subsequent to me. When he got here as much as speak to me, earlier than I had observed him. They have been pondering, I’m most likely gonna get pissed-off; this homeless man’s coming to ask me for cash or one thing. And it completely wasn’t what they anticipated.
Brooks: They see like a homeless man approaching any individual who’s simply, like, a standard man working a job in San Francisco or one thing—
Evan: Precisely, coming dwelling from work late at evening and—
Brooks: —and also you sort of see an outdated pal.
Evan: Proper. Or me. Once I see any individual in that very same place, it’s sort of laborious for me to—like, somebody with a fucked-up leg, or simply can’t stand up from someplace ’trigger they’re so sick. It’s like, Fuck.
Brooks: This isn’t the one time this has occurred lately. Evan sees himself everywhere in the metropolis. When cops and EMTs try to maneuver somebody alongside handed out exterior of a espresso store, there he’s. When his co-workers on the kitchen complain about homeless and addicted folks, he fantasizes about telling them about his previous.
He lives simply two blocks away from the place he spent the final 5 years, however he would possibly as nicely stay in one other world. Nonetheless, the boundaries between outdated and new might be porous.
Evan: This final couple nights, I’ve needed to go to conferences as a result of I’ve been bored, and I actually sort of miss that hustle of—sort of the joy of, I gotta go increase from right here and dodge the safety guard after which get on the BART after which dodge the BART police after which steal from this retailer after which come again out, after which simply all that pleasure bullshit. I sort of miss the chaos.
Brooks: He tries to not suppose an excessive amount of concerning the future. A whole lot of therapy, at this level, remains to be centered on the current. However he does have one concept for what he would possibly do.
Evan: My background allowing, I wish to be an armed safety guard. I feel that will be cool.
Brooks: Whoa, why?
Evan: As a result of that’s the sort of craziness that I feel I want. Not, like, with-a-gun armed, however like with a baton or pepper spray. I’m not saying that daily I’m gonna go to work that I’m gonna be like this, this douche safety guard that, like, pepper-sprays you.
Brooks: It’s so humorous. It’s such as you’re simply turning into your like worst enemy from not way back.
Evan: In a method, yeah. However I’d additionally suppose I’d have—I feel I may give again to Goal for all of the shit I stole by being an excellent safety guard.
Brooks: Simply going again to that very same Goal and going to work that. The place was that?
Evan: Emeryville.
Brooks: There was a narrative Evan advised me again earlier than he began therapy. To assist his behavior, he was going to the identical Goal in Emeryville, exterior of Oakland, day after day after day, stealing stuff and promoting it within the Mission District.
He went to that very same Goal in Emeryville so many instances in a row, it had begun to really feel absurd that he hadn’t been caught but.
Brooks: You have been like, I can’t imagine this hasn’t occurred. It seems like Groundhog’s Day.
Evan: Oh, that’s proper. Yeah.
Brooks: He advised himself that after they did catch him, that’s when he’d get clear. But it surely by no means occurred.
Brooks: Does that in any respect really feel like an try to return and cease your previous self? Fulfilling that want you had for somebody to catch you at that time.
Evan: Proper, and simply give them that, like, Oh, it’s over lastly.
[Music]
Evan: It rains right here on Christmas for every week yearly, and I at all times realize it’s coming, and I do know it’s gonna come this 12 months, and it’ll be the primary time the place I will likely be inside, and I’m so grateful for that.
Brooks: Evan will keep in San Francisco in the meanwhile. Within the spring, he’ll fly out to Washington to go to Joe.
This episode was produced by me, Ethan Brooks and Natalie Brennan. Edited by Jocelyn Frank and Hanna Rosin. Engineering by Rob Smierciak. Reality-checking by Sam Fentress. Claudine Ebeid is the manager producer of Atlantic audio, and Andrea Valdez is our managing editor.
If you happen to benefit from the present, you possibly can assist our work and the work of all Atlantic journalists if you subscribe to The Atlantic at TheAtlantic.com/Listener.
Thanks for listening.
